NESCA is currently accepting Therapy and Executive Function Coaching clients from middle school-age through adulthood with Therapist/Executive Function Coach/Parent Coach Carly Loureiro, MSW, LCSW. Carly specializes in the ASD population and also sees individuals who are highly anxious, depressed, or suffer with low self-esteem. She also offers parent coaching and family sessions when needed. For more information or to schedule appointments, please complete our Intake Form.

Kids Want to Do Well and Would If They Could

By: Cynthia Hess, PsyD
Pediatric Neuropsychologist Fellow and Therapist

Ross Greene, Ph.D., is the author of several books including The Explosive Child, Lost at School, Lost and Found, and his most recent book, Raising Human Beings. He also is the founder of Lives in the Balance, a non-profit dedicated to supporting families with behaviorally challenging children. The foundation of his approach is that all kids want to do well and would if they could. Dr. Greene emphasizes using a collaborative problem-solving approach, which he calls Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS). This model is based on the assertion that challenging behaviors arise when a child is faced with expectations that exceed their capacity to respond adaptively. Thus, adults are encouraged to take a collaborative, proactive approach to managing challenging behavior as opposed to relying on punishment and rewards.

The focus of collaborative problem-solving is not on the child’s challenging behavior, which could range from crying and whining, to hitting and biting, but rather on the expectations the child is having difficulty meeting. Adults work to identify the problematic expectations and the skills the child is lacking to meet the expectations. Dr. Greene refers to unmet expectations as “unsolved problems.” The goal is to solve those problems rather than modify behavior. Dr. Greene describes the CPS model as non-punitive and non-adversarial, and as such, it decreases the likelihood of conflict, enhances relationships and improves communication.

As a result of the pandemic, many parents and children are spending much more time together. For some parents of challenging children, their child’s behavior has been exacerbated by the increase in uncertainty and constantly changing expectations. There are many situations that arise that may lead to power struggles with children. It is important to remember that behavior is communication. Families are encouraged to reconsider their expectations and work collaboratively with their children to solve problems, especially when faced with extraordinary circumstances.

The specifics of collaborative problem-solving are much more detailed than there is space in this blog, and I encourage you to check out the resources listed below. While the consequences of the pandemic are certainly very stressful, they also present a good opportunity for families to enhance communication, uncover unsolved problems, teach skills and foster resilience.

 

Books for families by Dr. Greene:

The Explosive Child

Raising Human Beings

Website – contains educational videos and free resources for families and educators: https://www.livesinthebalance.org/about-cps

There are many YouTube videos available about CPS, but this one is pertinent to our current circumstances

 

About the Author

Dr. Cynthia Hess recently graduated from Rivier University with a PsyD in Counseling and School Psychology. Previously, she earned an M.A. from Antioch New England in Applied Psychology. She also worked as an elementary school counselor and school psychologist for 15 years before embarking on her doctorate. During her doctorate, she did her pre-doctoral internship with RIT in Rochester, N.Y. where she worked with youth ages 5-17 who had experienced complex developmental trauma. Dr. Hess’s first post-doctoral fellowship was with The Counseling Center of New England where she provided psychotherapy and family therapy to children ages 5-18, their families and young adults. She also trained part-time with a pediatric neuropsychologist conducting neuropsychological evaluations. Currently, Dr. Hess is a second-year post-doctoral fellow in pediatric neuropsychological assessment, working with NESCA Londonderry’s Dr. Angela Currie.

 

To schedule an appointment with one of NESCA’s expert neuropsychologists, please complete our online intake form

 

Neuropsychology & Education Services for Children & Adolescents (NESCA) is a pediatric neuropsychology practice and integrative treatment center with offices in Newton and Plainville, Massachusetts, and Londonderry, New Hampshire, serving clients from preschool through young adulthood and their families. For more information, please email info@nesca-newton.com or call 617-658-9800.